Well on the average day I would say I value life. I have a incurable disease and a chronic one that makes life sometimes challenging. I have three kids my youngest is still in school. These past couple of years my condition has got worse but I keep on going. I at one point I thought about ending it all...not just because of the illness but just major stress too. I sat in a mall parking lot for I guess a couple of hours just crying and feeling sorry for myself and thinking about wrapping my car around a light poll. Until my mom called and I couldn't even talk to her. A place called "Call for Help" popped into my head and I called them. Not sure how I got the number even. I had someone to talk to. Then I called a local church/center (not even my religion) I had someone else to talk to. I then called my mom, then my kids. I felt better. My problems were still there but I felt like I could control them. I felt a weight lifted...I prayed a lot and asked God for answers. I never in my life had these kinds of thoughts before. I do want to see my loved ones in heaven someday and suicide I new was not the right path. I thought of my kids and my mom and just new I could not leave them. Today...I am close to losing my house, my medical bills are crazy, my power bill is to the roof but I still have my family that loves me and I love them...we will work it out...somehow I just have to believe that it will.